Tuesday, July 19, 2011
Morning on the porch
Grace. Deb is out of town this week and I have slept great! Which after the fears that followed the break in two weeks ago, I can only say is a peace from Jesus. I feel encouraged. Kendra and Mark coming on Sunday to fix some things around the house and share lunch. Hans and Ashley blessed me to no end last night, coming to see the house and encourage me with their friendship (and amazing cheese cake, thank you very much!). I sat on the porch this morning just having a grand time. I was praying over my neighborhood. I feel stuck sometimes in how to meet people. So I just told the Lord, that I still exalt the fear of man and whatever else that keeps me from reaching out. I asked the Lord to bring opportunity my way, to help me take it. Not moments later a man who was working at the house across the street walked by the front gate, so I said "buenos dias" and he proceeded to come across the street for a chat (in Spanish - and oh how I need some help there!) and to invite me to his church :-) Not long after that, back in my chair on the porch, an elderly Vietnamese lady on a walk goes strolling by. When I say hi to her she stops for a chat too. I love it! Isn't that awesome?! I was delighted. What a gracious Father our God is. He is not heavy handed. I admit I'm scared and weak and lacking, so He brings people to my yard! What an Encourager God is.
Thursday, July 14, 2011
A front patio evening
There is a big glowing moon rising over the neighbor's eucalyptus tree, it's cool outside and I am just plain happy. Deb and I sat out and for the billionth time she graciously listened to me and my rambling thoughts. I really do have an intention to come out to the porch and just sit quietly, I told her...it just never happens. We were discussing how great is God who redeems. There were some words spoken to me in the past that I don't know whether they were spoken in hate or in love, but either way they hurt and I didn't appreciate them, at the time. But God surely has redeemed whatever in those past conversations failed to reflect His glory in order to further bring about His purposes. As I sat out there tonight I was thinking of the house just west of us. I wanted to go invite myself over - there was a large group meeting going on though and not just a open gathering...but I'm hopeful for a chance. We had been trying for three days to catch the neighbor across the street outside long enough to introduce ourselves and give her a plate of cookies. Yesterday I saw her walking out and it was an absolute mad dash for shoes and cookies as we burst out the door. So, Jesus let us meet her :-) And although she actually asked if the cookies were poison, her husband waved and thanked us for them later which was like icing on our proverbial cake.
We were talking tonight about in the fall-time how we might use Halloween as a way to meet the kids in our neighborhood and invite them over for some sort of after-party a few days later and that we want to give out the bestest treats and just love on those kids sooo much. I don't even know if kids go around this neighborhood, but if they do I want to love their socks off. So that was one of the things Deb and I had been discussing. Convictions. A lot of the time someone tells you what their conviction is (and I am not talking about core Gospel truth here, but areas that scripture leaves open to the Holy Spirit's leading and that we must depend on Him for in determining how we are to sort out issues of culture and such). But someone may share a conviction they have, and they darn well expect you to share that conviction. It's hard for us. We don't understand why someone wouldn't share our position on something we feel so passionately about. Can't you see, it's so obvious?! And often conviction is preached as non-negotiable which really just leads to religion: not doing or doing something because someone they "worshiped" in a sense, who's opinion they valued, said that if you do this or that or don;t, well then by golly you must really love Jesus and are a better person, especially compared to those who ignore this or don't hold to the same "conviction". Now assuming the one who started this really did seek the Lord and this was truly a work of the Holy Spirit in his or her heart, the problem is that if we preach our convictions as non-negotiable or shame people who don't agree we are not letting people be guided by God the Spirit, but shackling them to a bunch of rules that don't save or give life. That person hasn't reached a conviction through seeking the Truth of Scripture and the Savior revealed through its Gospel. They are looking now to a person (or that person is trying to be the Spirit to them) and hoping that by adhering to these rules they will somehow please God, or at least get a bigger gold star then the next guy. If we preach our convictions we get a bunch of self-righteous, shamed or scared people. If we preach Jesus, His Gospel and Power, and the freedom and guidance that are found in that Gospel, well then if someone is given the same conviction, we can rejoice with them, and if not, we can rejoice that our God is great and holy and a revealer of mysteries. It may even lead us to further examine our own heart before the Lord and ask if we are really living under His rule and reign, His heart for the world and the culture we live in, or are we making gods of ourselves and determining what makes us righteous apart from Him? I say this because I am constantly being shown areas where I have not sought the Spirit's guidance in my life on how to approach issues within my life and culture, but I have gone off the expectations, opinions or even genuine Spirit-led convictions of another. These may come through religious institutions, friends, pop-culture, whatever, and sometimes they have really good arguments and sounds pretty intelligent. But see, God uses foolish things to shame the "wise" and often turns what we think are great reasons upside down. It's strange to me how God gives different freedoms to his kids, but Paul talks about that. That some have freedoms others don't, but those come from God the Spirit, not so-and-so the man. And whatever we do, we do it to His glory, not to our own boast. For what do we have to boast? As always, nothing. And, thank God, He is at work in us, to bring us to image Christ more. So give people grace in their convictions. Theirs (and yours) are very likely to change as you grow in Him, as He reveals truth to you, as you submit under his Lordship, and even as He graciously points out that what you were calling conviction and being led by the Spirit was just pride, and as such, sin. Bummer huh? I've been there. Now that's a conviction: for God's Holiness to show you that what you thought was godly was pride/sin. So is your righteousness in your "convictions" and how well you keep to them, OR is your hope, your righteousness, your trust in the One and Only, the Great Unchangeable, the one who opens blind eyes and melts hearts of stone. Let Him lead you and others in the way you each should go. When He leads, his kids don't depart from the road. When we try to take over His job, we bring discouragement, shame, pride, all kinds of nasty stuff and those kids just end up ditching his trail. HE is the one who is Life. Now, just so we're clear, I am not saying don't preach Truth. There are clear things in scripture that are not arguable. Those things, on them stand firm. The rest? Let HIM be the one to work and to will His good pleasure. He is very good at it.
We were talking tonight about in the fall-time how we might use Halloween as a way to meet the kids in our neighborhood and invite them over for some sort of after-party a few days later and that we want to give out the bestest treats and just love on those kids sooo much. I don't even know if kids go around this neighborhood, but if they do I want to love their socks off. So that was one of the things Deb and I had been discussing. Convictions. A lot of the time someone tells you what their conviction is (and I am not talking about core Gospel truth here, but areas that scripture leaves open to the Holy Spirit's leading and that we must depend on Him for in determining how we are to sort out issues of culture and such). But someone may share a conviction they have, and they darn well expect you to share that conviction. It's hard for us. We don't understand why someone wouldn't share our position on something we feel so passionately about. Can't you see, it's so obvious?! And often conviction is preached as non-negotiable which really just leads to religion: not doing or doing something because someone they "worshiped" in a sense, who's opinion they valued, said that if you do this or that or don;t, well then by golly you must really love Jesus and are a better person, especially compared to those who ignore this or don't hold to the same "conviction". Now assuming the one who started this really did seek the Lord and this was truly a work of the Holy Spirit in his or her heart, the problem is that if we preach our convictions as non-negotiable or shame people who don't agree we are not letting people be guided by God the Spirit, but shackling them to a bunch of rules that don't save or give life. That person hasn't reached a conviction through seeking the Truth of Scripture and the Savior revealed through its Gospel. They are looking now to a person (or that person is trying to be the Spirit to them) and hoping that by adhering to these rules they will somehow please God, or at least get a bigger gold star then the next guy. If we preach our convictions we get a bunch of self-righteous, shamed or scared people. If we preach Jesus, His Gospel and Power, and the freedom and guidance that are found in that Gospel, well then if someone is given the same conviction, we can rejoice with them, and if not, we can rejoice that our God is great and holy and a revealer of mysteries. It may even lead us to further examine our own heart before the Lord and ask if we are really living under His rule and reign, His heart for the world and the culture we live in, or are we making gods of ourselves and determining what makes us righteous apart from Him? I say this because I am constantly being shown areas where I have not sought the Spirit's guidance in my life on how to approach issues within my life and culture, but I have gone off the expectations, opinions or even genuine Spirit-led convictions of another. These may come through religious institutions, friends, pop-culture, whatever, and sometimes they have really good arguments and sounds pretty intelligent. But see, God uses foolish things to shame the "wise" and often turns what we think are great reasons upside down. It's strange to me how God gives different freedoms to his kids, but Paul talks about that. That some have freedoms others don't, but those come from God the Spirit, not so-and-so the man. And whatever we do, we do it to His glory, not to our own boast. For what do we have to boast? As always, nothing. And, thank God, He is at work in us, to bring us to image Christ more. So give people grace in their convictions. Theirs (and yours) are very likely to change as you grow in Him, as He reveals truth to you, as you submit under his Lordship, and even as He graciously points out that what you were calling conviction and being led by the Spirit was just pride, and as such, sin. Bummer huh? I've been there. Now that's a conviction: for God's Holiness to show you that what you thought was godly was pride/sin. So is your righteousness in your "convictions" and how well you keep to them, OR is your hope, your righteousness, your trust in the One and Only, the Great Unchangeable, the one who opens blind eyes and melts hearts of stone. Let Him lead you and others in the way you each should go. When He leads, his kids don't depart from the road. When we try to take over His job, we bring discouragement, shame, pride, all kinds of nasty stuff and those kids just end up ditching his trail. HE is the one who is Life. Now, just so we're clear, I am not saying don't preach Truth. There are clear things in scripture that are not arguable. Those things, on them stand firm. The rest? Let HIM be the one to work and to will His good pleasure. He is very good at it.
Thursday, July 7, 2011
The first week
I wake in the early dawn with a peace and joy in my heart, supernatural, beyond comprehension. A soft pink sky, a dainty breeze. The sweet new mercies and grace of God are so beautiful!
We moved into the house this weekend. Sweet friends from church came to meet the needs involved in hauling stuff around. And even the piano found a place. Over the weekend, lots of hard work and sweat as we worked on fixing up basic things around the house and yard. As I stood under the sun filtered through a gracious haze of thin clouds I couldn't help smiling and rejoicing. I thought to all those years on "mission" trips, all the yard work and stuff. Ha! My house is the mission project now. And as I sat with Him and a section of Psalms, I literally wept. He is great and He alone.
But coming into that move, the spiritual attack as real and acute. We do not battle flesh and blood and we are stepping into a dark place with the Light of Truth. Our prowling enemy, that bully of the soul, seeks to destroy: hope, peace, joy, lives.
Tuesday, day 5, while we were at work the house was broken into and burgled. Honestly, I was very shaky and nervous for a little bit, but both Deb and I had to immediately praise Jesus. It was the most gracious of robberies really. And while some things were taken, it was as if God's hand came over them and said "enough". In the book of Job chapter 38 it is said of God that he tells the waves how far they can come up the shores and then He orders "this is where your proud heart stops". To say I had no fear? I did. But God is growing faith and lessening fear. Trusting God is worshipping Him, following Him, clinging to Him even when circumstance or your own butterfly-filled stomach tempt you not to. Our God is greater! And as He saw me through the next day and those fears He proves Himself all the more.
We moved into the house this weekend. Sweet friends from church came to meet the needs involved in hauling stuff around. And even the piano found a place. Over the weekend, lots of hard work and sweat as we worked on fixing up basic things around the house and yard. As I stood under the sun filtered through a gracious haze of thin clouds I couldn't help smiling and rejoicing. I thought to all those years on "mission" trips, all the yard work and stuff. Ha! My house is the mission project now. And as I sat with Him and a section of Psalms, I literally wept. He is great and He alone.
But coming into that move, the spiritual attack as real and acute. We do not battle flesh and blood and we are stepping into a dark place with the Light of Truth. Our prowling enemy, that bully of the soul, seeks to destroy: hope, peace, joy, lives.
Tuesday, day 5, while we were at work the house was broken into and burgled. Honestly, I was very shaky and nervous for a little bit, but both Deb and I had to immediately praise Jesus. It was the most gracious of robberies really. And while some things were taken, it was as if God's hand came over them and said "enough". In the book of Job chapter 38 it is said of God that he tells the waves how far they can come up the shores and then He orders "this is where your proud heart stops". To say I had no fear? I did. But God is growing faith and lessening fear. Trusting God is worshipping Him, following Him, clinging to Him even when circumstance or your own butterfly-filled stomach tempt you not to. Our God is greater! And as He saw me through the next day and those fears He proves Himself all the more.
Friday, July 1, 2011
Chapters end and begin
This week has past in a whirlwind. My new job began two weeks early with less than 24 hours notice in the middle of VBS week with church and packing all week for the move this weekend. I am amazed at all that God has worked down to the littlest details and that he continues to do in my life. I have cherished the last few months living with my dad again. His generosity and patience with me is astounding. I had hoped that by moving back home that now, even as an adult, I could learn to honor my parents. I have no way reached that goal to perfection, but how grateful I am for the lessons along the way and the memories here. And it makes me a bit sad. I have no idea what I am stepping in to next. But now it is time to move. Suddenly what began as a thought and prayer years ago and a voiced idea months ago is a reality, complete with packing tape and good friends to help out. The excitement shared among my church family for this move is amazing. I could not have hoped for more. Please be in prayer for Deb and I as we settle in, learn to work together and follow Jesus in Alhambra. God is good. Always.
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